Death Be Not Proud

DEATH be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadfull, for, thou art not so.

John Donne

Uncle Frank is Ralph's uncle, and he's dying. He has cancer, and he's fought the good fight for years, but he's losing, as we all do eventually. He's lived alone until a couple of months ago, when he couldn't get out of bed. Ralph took him to the hospital, and he went from there to rehab, then to long term care.

Being in the nursing home pissed him off. Nothing about the place suited him, especially the part about him having to be there. If he was physically able, I think he would have walked out. And who can blame him- he went from having a life, to being totally dependent on others, within a month.

Over the last month, he's gotten progressively weaker. A couple of weeks ago he stopped eating. He's done. Hospice has been called in to keep him comfortable, as per his wishes. In a period of lucidity, he told Ralph where he wants to be buried, and even what kind of coffin he wants.

Ralph's Mom, Florence, visits her brother every day. This is so hard for her- this is her little brother!
Ralph's brother Frank visits several times a week, and the strain is showing on him, also. Some of the "kids"- Uncle Franks great nephews and nieces - have been in to see him. My kids always called him Uncle Uncle Frank, to differentiate him from their Uncle Frank. When Heather went to see him, he thought she was Stephanie.

Helen goes almost every day. She's been Uncle Frank's best friend for years and years, and she's so good with him. The one day Ralph and I were talking to her, we were all okay, then she started to cry, and we all cried. We're all on the same page here, we know he's dying, and we so don't want him to be in any pain, and we don't want him to be afraid.

At this point, Death is Uncle Frank's friend. Death will be the permanent release from pain. We all hope there really is a Heaven (some of us are more sure of it than others of us), and if there is, we'll see him there.

Holly